Sheesh, I'm 40 Today.

Actually, I thought today would occur with a whole lot of tantrums and drama. Kinda like last year. I had a really crappy day on my 39th. Part of that was an inability to deal with the inevitability of 40, and part of it was to do with a crappy day/week/month at work. But the more that I have realized that a lot of my friends are already there (and survived it just fine!), and that nothing in the world matters more than Samantha and my family (hey, I never even used to leave the house without makeup or putting real clothes on--now I'm happy in sweats and bare skin on the weekends since I've begun to view things in perspective!), including, gasp, aging another year, the more I'm fine with today and the start of a new decade. I can't predict that I'll feel the same way in another 10 years, though.

I remember when my Dad turned 40. I also turned 21 two days later. I was a big milestone for both of us, and my brother had just been born and adopted the month before. There was a huge party down at the farm, where lots of people I'd known for a good portion of my life came--family, family friends, friends, etc. Huge. They even put up a big tent on the field. And there were lots and lots and lots of presents. Mainly for me and Josh, but possibly some for Dad.

I was on the back end of my rebellious stage then. I still found drama in everything. My father gave me a photo album of "my life", which was set up in sections according to the people I've known in my life. It started out with my parents, then my grandparents, then my friends throughout the years, then my pets. But, mind you, this was in the days before digital photos, and these were original photos that my dad had in his collection. Of course, Dramatic Me, felt that now that my little brother had come along (whom I adored--this was so exciting for me to finally have a sibling!), they were handing me back my life and moving on to his. These were their photos that they were giving back to me, photos that they would never have in their possession again.

Silly, I know. I got over it. :-)

That all being said, today will pass as uneventfully as yesterday (aside from the wonderful birthday present Steve & Samantha gave me--a spa day at Elizabeth Arden!!!!!!!), and existentially, nothing significant has changed.
I'm cool with that.